so, this guy i'm talking to know has all this drama with a chick that goes to school with us. I've never seen her in person until today. of all the days, [ when i don't feel pretty at all ], for me to run into her. i begged my friend to tell me I was prettier. i actually begged her. if i truly am or not is up for debate and neither relevant or possible to state as fact, but in that desperate moment I actually needed to be told how more pretty I was. looking back I feel so fucking stupid. this experience has taught me a lot about where I am in life right now. through all the partying and fun, men and mall visit's; i'm an insecure girl who is so confused about herself she has to ask for confidence. I wont lie and say that my feelings of discomfort are gone but the first step towards getting out of this funk i'm in is acknowledging the funk i'm in. so, acknowledged ... *beat ... now what?


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Alexandria said...

I know exactly how you feel, Sometimes I feel like the uglist person in the room, I'm too worried about what everyone else has on, how everyone elses hair blows with the wind and how mine barely has movement to it even when i touch it ha. I guess everyone has there moments but as long as you tell yourself that your beautiful then you are, The only person you can believe is yourself, as far as running into that other girl on a not so good day pssh i go by this motto "dress like your gunna run into your worst enemy" cause you never know where she/he may show up ;)